2011

After a long overdue meeting with my advisor, it appears that this will be the year that I enter medical school, if all goes as planned. I am a little bummed that it is not going to be 2010. I have to keep reminding myself that, while I am a senior, I have only been in college for 2 years, then transferred. I am actually right on track with the pre-med issue. It is just that I completed a senior-level's worth of courses in two years. And (phew!) I can postpone my MCAT until next spring.
Next fall is going to be brutal. I start my Biochemistry sequence ( 1, 2, 3), my Organic Chemistry series (1, 2, 3), and my final math for all time, Calculus series ( Calc 1, 2, and 3). Somewhere along the way, I need another lit course, and another phiolsophy course (planning for "Ethics and Medicine", even though I have had a Bioethics course). In spring of 2010, it is all about my MCAT and applying to med schools. Somewhere in this journey, I need to move across the river so I am more likely to get an in-state seat at UC COM. (And a $60K discount on medical school.)

Everything I have planned, worked for, dreamed of is laid out right before my eyes. For the first time, I am starting to believe I am really going to do this. My dream is coming true.

On a separate note, Evan is dying to see the new Hannah Montana movie. He's got the soundtrack, and forces us to listen to it in the car. Instead of being irritated, I heard this song and cried.

Miley Cyrus - The Climb (Rockamerica) @ Yahoo! Video

School Days, Schoooooool Days.....

oh screw it! I don't know the rest of the words!

I am procrastinating. I have to do the following:

Chem Lab Report
Study for Bio Exam
Study for Chem Exam
Study for History Exam
Study for Bio Lab Practical
Prepare for this week's Chem Lab (We have an exam over required reading before each lab.)
Prepare for Bio Lab (Same as above)

I have not slept since 2 PM on Sunday. Somewhere in this mess, I must close my eyes. I need to motivate myself.

This is my reminder of why I am insistent on putting myself through this torture:

The Disclaimer

I went on Blackboard, as in the school software that serves as a communication network, a way to post assignments and grades, etc., for school to double check that all of my grades were submitted and there were no errors. There is this little tab that lists the courses in which you are currently enrolled. My list had grown substantially. There were 4 each of chem and bio, etc. It took me a second to realize that next quarter's classes are on there already, along with last quarter's. Cool. I can get a head start.

I start with the syllabus to history, and pull it up so I can print it out. I had a brief moment of panic when I saw that there are going to be graduate students in it, as there are two different sets of requirements for the course for grad students and undergrad students. I had to stop and remind myself that I am a senior and these people are just a year or two further in their education than I am. That turned to "Cool! I am SENIOR!".

Moving on to psych and chem. No biggie for either, though I am scared of chem just a bit this quarter. After all, last quarter almost broke me. And that was at a little campus in a small class. This time I am at the main campus, there are going to be about 300 in my class. Oh well, I digress...

The only given is biology. I save this class for last because it is going to calm me down after seeing the others. I am excited to see that the professor has everything for the entire quarter posted already. PowerPoint presentations, outlines, and even exam reviews. Sweet! I can get started right away on bio, and do really well this quarter, as it is my major, after all. I start with the syllabus, and pull it up to print it. I notice it is taking a long time to print, so I look. Why is his syllabus 20 pages?????! WTF? So I start to read it. There is a damned disclaimer on it, in bold type. In so many words, it says that the course is notorious for a high percentage of withdrawals, D's and F's. That the course is specifically designed for Biology majors and thus is designed for a student who can manage a large amount of information in a short period of time. That if the reader is not a Biology major, they will most likely not be able to be successful in the course, and there are other more basic biology courses that would be more appropriate for them. Oh. Shit.
I am scared. And I am already studying for it. I managed to get all of the material for the first exam printed off. There were 200 pages. Seriously.

Done.

Finals are, that is. I got A's on everything except chemistry, which I don't know about yet, as he still hasn't posted the grades. He has this complicated grading policy, where you choose up to so many points of homework and quizzes. These count as your grade for those, so you get to choose the highest ones to count. IF you perform better on the final, he also has this grade replacement policy. This means that instead of my final being worth 300 points, it becomes worth 500, and my other two exams are no longer worth 200, but will then be worth 100 each.

I am hoping I did well on the final, because then my chemistry grade will be an A as well, and I am off to the next level in about a week and a half. I am such a geek that I am ready to buy my books and throw myself into studying. Of course this is more about necessity than it is about my love of the subjects. I enrolled in 18 credit hours this next semester. That plus work is not a pretty picture. Organization and studying in advance is required to keep it all from falling in on me.

Hope and Frustration are the Words of the Day

W.I.S.E.= Women in Science and Engineering. This is a program UC has that allows undergraduate uperclassmen females to gain research experience in the form of a 12-week research position over the summer, assisting with one of the numerous projects the university has going on at any given time. I'm a woman. I'm in science. I am senior molecular bio major. I threw my hat in the ring for this. I was turned down because I have a job. Seriously. Despite the fact that I work my full-time obligations over the weekend and am free around the clock Monday through Friday, I am not permitted to have outside employment for the internship. And while there is nothing wrong with any honest job these days, I had to explain to them that this was not a "job" as in minimum wage at McDonald's for gas money while in college. I have a career that supports an entire family. The director wasn't hearing any of it, and actually made some snippy comments about how I manage upperclassman level work while having a "career". That my grades must reflect it. This was my opportunity to say, "Actually, I have a 4.0 GPA, and that is not all. I am married with a child as well." Translation: I can manage my time, and nothing falls by the wayside in the process. Her response? "Well, we all have a lot to learn from your example." Yes, despite your Ph.D. overshadowing my attempts to gain entry into medical school, you do.

Later that night, I went to my biology lecture. My professor there is like a rock star in my eyes. 28 years old and has a PhD in molecular biology. I was talking with her about the "no work" guideline before class as we waited for the rest of the class to arrive. This is when she told me that, if I am just looking for a research internship and not an actual paid job, she is sure her boss would love to have me. She is going to reccomend me for an internship there. Where is there? Hahaha. University of Cincinnati College of...........Medicine. Yep, that's right. So when I finally complete the application for med school at UC, I could actually put this internship with them under the "Experience" category. Sweet.

As for the rest of my education....We are 3 weeks from the end of the quarter. Wow that went fast! I was wondering why my course load seemed to be taking so much work. I mean, yes, I do work full time now, which is a new factor in this. When I was taking 24 credit hours a semester, I was busy, but it never seemes this overwhelming. Well, I thought about it. Does me working on the weekends have that much of an impact? The answer to that is yes. Those are three full days that I could have to study if I didn't spend them working. Unfortunately, work is not optional. But is I am used to managing 24 credit hours, then 13 should not be that hard during the week. The answer to this problem: the quarter system. I was foolish to think that the courses would compensate for the lack of time. I was thinking that UC would be easier because of the quarter system. After all, you have more chances to earn the same amount of credit hours as a semster would provide, but you get three quarters instead of one semester. Ha! I was wrong.

The courses cover the same amount of material a semester-long course would, but in about 8 weeks less. They move fast, and if you fall behind in one little aspect of any class, you are lost for good.

So here I am, three weeks from the end of my first quarter back to school. My grades are intact, and I am passing everything. I am sure I am going to get an A in biology and it's lab. I think I will get an A in my chem lab as well. My chemistry course may be a B. I asked my prof yesterday if it was still possible for me to pull out with an A, and he said absolutely yes, I could. But he looked me straight in the eye and said that I needed to allow myself more time. He says I know the stuff, and the nights before the last two exams, he doesn't want me to look at the book at all. That all of the mistakes I made on the last exam were silly ones to questions he knew I knew how to answer. He's right. When I went to do my self assessment on the exam to recover the points I lost, and I had to provide the correct answer, there was only one question for which I had to physically look up the answer. For the rest, I was able to just provide the correct answer from the knowledge I already have. That tells me I should have only missed one question out of the 200 points. But more time? How? Where is that to come from?

I actually took some vacation time the week of my finals. I have no intention of answering my phone that week. I work the Friday night prior to my exam week, but then am off of work until the Saturday of the next week. My latest exam is on Tuesday of that week. I was thinking I would pick up some overtime after I am finished with my exams that week, but now I am thinking that I am just going to use those extra days off to relax. To be nice to myself as I wait for my grades. I will have earned it.

Nothing Changes But the Seasons

Haha!

My first round of exams has been completed for the quarter.
Biology: Big-Time A, even though most in the class failed it. I am officially the curve-breaker once again.
Chemistry: Hmmmf! I failed the damned thing. I am Andrea, dammit! Yet I failed a chem exam. I shouldn't be too hard on myself. Everyone else did as well. Just when I was about to drop the course, I was reassured when I was told that my prof is notorious for "breaking you" in the beginning. The exam was terrible, really. I literally started to tear up a bit in the last part of it. And when I saw my grade? I needed some Ativan. Seriously. The good news is, since everyone did terribly, he has given us the exam back and we are to prepare a "Self-Assessment" to be submitted in the form of short essays for each missed question, to include what the hell we were thinking that caused us to give the wrong answer, and what the correct answer is with the logic that explains why it is the corrct answer. Lots of work. My rough draft of mine is already completed. I just have to neaten it up a bit and submit it, even though it isn't due until the 17th. I guess I just got excited about the idea of earning back my points. It has been my priority over the past couple of days.
Calculus: I am dropping this course tomorrow morning. It is just too difficult for me to stay awake after my shifts to go to this little 50 minute class. I plan to retake it with the same professor next quarter, if I can.

I am still doing th standard 3 twelve-hour shifts on the weekends. Blah. At least tonight is my Friday.