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Finally, a real conversation regarding this decision John is making. It went like this:

"John, you have to promise me that nothing is going to happen to you over there. my life cannot take any more tragedy. I will end up in a mental institution."

"Then maybe I shouldn't go, because you know I cannot make that promise if I go off to war."

"But you don't understand what I am saying to you. You need to do this for YOU, not me or Evan. We are tough and resilient. I don't want you to do it for us, for the same reason I don't want you to NOT do it because of us. This is about you, and whatever you do, I will support 100%. I just need to know what you want so I know. What do you want?"

"Oooorah."

Just like that. Total absence of doubt. Fire in his eyes. He knows.